More and more individuals choose
termination of their intended long term relationship – electing
to exchange their current partner for a new one – and often
exchanging their children as well. It’s not an emotional
stable/healthy situation for kids - and generally emotionally
and financially expensive for the adults as well. Why does it
happen?
(Note: Current divorce rates exceed
50% of formal marriages in the U.S. For the first time in history,
the quantity of households with individuals ‘living together’
exceeded those of married households.)
There’s a new e-book available via the Internet - Sensuality-Intimacy-Sex
– that explores how we use our sensuality to either bond
our intended long-term relationships – or help to destroy/terminate
them.
Some of the writings in the collection
are very controversial – especially those that challenge
our current cultural mandate based on the ‘Romantic Ideal’
– the circa 12th Century myth that trains us to believe
and expect that there is only one ‘Soul-Mate’ for
each of us in life.
The Romantic Ideal also holds that
once we find our ‘One and Only’ – we enter into
a society-implicit mutual agreement with a partner for ‘Person
Ownership’ – each of the partners ‘owns’
the other’s heart, mind and soul – but most especially
owns the other’s private body-parts (sexual organs).
In an ‘Exclusive Coupling’
form of Love Organization (marriage/living together) – no
one except the partner, is ever to touch private body-parts with
yet another (engage in sensual activities) – forever
– ‘Till Death You Part’. You may only engage
in sensual activities with yet another – after you terminate
your relationship with your current partner and often, best friend.
Meaning you can have relationships serially – but not at
the same time.
And therein lies the rub, suggest
the book. It posits that our actual human physiology doesn’t
fit our cultural mandate for life-long exclusiveness – to
wit, that recent knowledge in neurochemistry (studies of brain
chemicals) indicate that the involuntary flow of the ‘chemicals’
produced by our bodies that we’ve been taught mean ‘we
are in love’ – only keep flowing for a specific individual
- for periods as little as three months – to about sixty
months. Not especially good news for ‘Harlequin Romance’
freaks and the ‘Happily Ever After’ crowd.
There’s also a section that
deals with so-called ‘Sensuality Interest Levels’
– an individual’s desire to engage in sensual activities
– stating that some individuals have higher interest levels
– others lower levels. And that higher or lower is not better
or worse – just different. Relationship issues occur when
a higher is exclusively paired with a lower – which is often
the cause of cheating, affairs, separations – even divorce.
The book provides three basic indices for self-evaluation of one’s
sensuality interest levels – and suggests that a partner
also takes the self-exam – and then compare the results
to identify differences, and hopefully resolve them amicability
and sensibly.
Through various short cameos, you’ll
be ‘walking in the shoes’ of individual’s living
in each of the so-called Love Organizations: Exclusive
Coupling (marriage/living together) – Promiscuity
(cheating) – Sensual Hermitage (abstinence)
– Swinging (recreational sex) – Intimate
Best Friends (polyamory). Through the eyes and
feelings of various writers, you’ll see the ‘Good
Sides’ of each Love Organization (why people want to live
that way) and the ‘Not Good Sides’ (why people later
leave for another Love Organization).
It’s a thought-provoking read
for folks interested in stable long-term relationships. The book
explicitly states that it ‘provides no answers – only
questions - that any answers must ultimately be provided by each
individual’.
As the book attracts more readers,
expect religious folks to weigh in – both pro and con. And
if in time the ‘questions’ actually result in more
stable families and less relationship terminations – expect
the divorce attorneys and family counselors to also join in the
intellectual fray.
The collection of writings was almost
ten years in the making with writers composed of each gender,
of various ages, and the three different sensual orientations
(opposite – same - either). Apparently all genders and ages
have the same relationship/sensuality issues to wrestle with.
The 278 page e-book is available
for instant download and reading for $6.99 (USD)
You can review the book, table of contents, and selections of
various writings at:
www.Sensuality-Intimacy-Sex.com
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